Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
