Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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