I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize
