if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
