I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize