people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
But break dance skills will only take you so far
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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