it hurts more in the daytime
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
did i walk over a car last night?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Randomize
