Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
My feet surprised me
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
