What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
