he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
