i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Randomize
