Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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