i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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