Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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