How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I enjoy the company of your penis
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