the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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