oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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