new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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