Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
