Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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