It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize