And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
