I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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