Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
