But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Cover your peen. We're going out.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
