does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I'm like, not good at living.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
