We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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