Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
