I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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