Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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