Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
