whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
There's always time for handjobs
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
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