That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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