how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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