My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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