3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
