4 words: hood of his car
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
