Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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