You really coming over, don't trick.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize