The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
50% drunk capacity currently
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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