perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize