What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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