DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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