Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
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