it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
