Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
