I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize