I think scott just propositioned me for sex
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
