1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
