Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
