i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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